


Carried

by holdyourbreathfornow



Series: HYBFN Freak Fam Stuff [2]
Category: Freak Fam - Fandom
Genre: Cheesy Dialogue, Cussing, Multi, Near Death Experiences, Warehouse fire, so much cussing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-10
Updated: 2019-08-10
Packaged: 2020-08-16 04:07:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20190259
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/holdyourbreathfornow/pseuds/holdyourbreathfornow
Summary: Three times Shirk was carried by one of his date mates





	1. Fireman’s Carry

The fire roared through the walls and broken windows of the warehouse. In the street, a lone black van sat perpendicular to the building. Almost as soon as the fire had blazed to life the back doors of the van had swung open and two figures staggered out, clinging to each other.

“Oh Jesus!” Vinny yelled while Disaster could only stare in mute horror. Shirk and Ace has been in that building… 

The four of them were scouring it out to see if they could use it as storage for some contraband the Freak Fam had ordered in. But Disaster had been confined to the van because of an injury she’d gotten in a bar fight, and Vinny volunteered to stay with her. (Mostly to keep her from running in after everyone else, not that anyone admitted that out loud.)

“Fucking shit!” Vinny swore again, with even more vehemence. “Okay, dammit, Disaster, c’mon.” Uselessly, the larger of the two pulled their girlfriend back to the van and helped her collapse onto the floor of the van.

“They’re in there, Vinny…” Disaster whispered and Vinny nodded in agonized agreement.

“What do we do, Disaster?” They asked the blue-haired woman. This prompting snapped her out of her reverie and she clawed the side of the van, pulling herself to her feet with one hand and whipping her phone out of her pocket with the other. 

“Okay! Fucking motherfuck! I’ll make some calls! We’ve got a couple fire trucks I can get here and-“ Before she could finish what she was saying, the front doors of the warehouse flew off their hinges, the now-open mouth of the warehouse leaking smoke and fire. 

Ace staggered from the doorway, Shirk limply slung over their shoulder in a fireman’s carry. Disaster sagged back against the wall of the van while Vinny ran forward and grabbed Ace and Shirk, hauling the two of them back to the van and helping them inside.

Ace sagged in the shotgun seat, head pressed to the cool window, while Disaster and Shirk sat on the floor in the back of the van, Shirk’s head in Disaster’s lap as she scrutinized the bloody cut over one of his eyes.

“We’re fine, Vinny.” Ace whispered as they turned and saw Vinny white-knuckling the steering wheel.

“Damn near weren’t.” Vinny snapped and Ace reached over with one hand, nudging at Vinny’s wrist until they released one hand and interlaced their fingers with Ace’s.

“Let’s go home.” Ace muttered and in the back of the van, Shirk pulled his eyes open to smile up at Disaster, who sighed in relief.


	2. Bridal Carry

“Ain’t tired.” Shirk growled, eyes heavy and head rolling forward to land against his chest before he jerked it right back up.

“Sure you aren’t, honey.” Disaster simpered in fake sympathy and Shirk flipped her off to the sound of her amused giggling.

The two of them were in the living room of the apartment. Ace was out with the Chaos Crew and Vinny had taken a late night job for an old friend of theirs. So the two of them were the only ones in the apartment that night.

So obviously they were curled up on the couch watching Golden Girls. Disaster had her hair pulled back in a bun and Shirk’s hung loose round his face like a scarlet curtain. Disaster was painting Shirk’s nails while the two of them casually continued the age-old fight of her trying to get Shirk to go to sleep.

“I don’t want to sleep.” Shirk admitted quietly and Disaster nodded somberly, stroking Shirk’s hand with her thumb as she layered on the final touches of nail polish.

“I know, baby. Don’t worry, you don’t have to if you don’t want to.” The episode that was playing as background noise ended and the TV went back to the main menu, waiting for the next episode to be queued up. Disaster released Shirk’s hands, letting him examine the polish on them as she nudged at his legs, sitting in her lap and effectively pinning her to the couch. “Let me up, I’ll start the next episode and get us some drinks.”

Shirk leaned his head back against the couch and looked at Disaster with green eyes that glittered in the light the TV threw off.

“Nah.” He said and Disaster exaggerated a grimace at him as she tried to stand. When she realized Shirk genuinely wasn’t going to let her up, she smiled at him and settled into the plush embrace of the couch. 

They sat there, staring at each other, for so long the TV switched off and threw them into sudden darkness. Disaster shrieked with laughter and Shirk leaned forward, seizing her around the waist and pressing a kiss to her cheek. She grinned at him and he returned it more sedately.

“Do you want to go lay in bed? You don’t have to sleep, but I do have to be up early for a negotiation over breakfast tomorrow.” Shirk stayed leaning over Disaster, the two of them breathing the same air, as he seriously considered what Disaster was asking him.

“I’ll make a deal with you, since you’re the negotiator and all.” Shirk told Disaster, who rolled her eyes even though her smile never dropped from her face. “I will… Go lay in bed with you if you can carry me there.”

“Deal.” Disaster responded immediately, which shocked Shirk and sent a grin growing over his face. He reached forward and tucked a stray strand of Disaster’s hair behind her ear.

“You know you don’t have to do this, right?” 

“I-” she told him imperiously, taking his hand and holding it, “-am perfectly aware of that, Mr. Raya.”

“Alright.” Shirk shrugged and unravelled himself from Disaster, sprawling against the couch as she got to her feet. “Carry me.”

And carry him she did.

As if he weighed nothing, Disaster scooped his legs into one arm and wrapped the other under his arms. Too surprised to really react, Shirk threw his arms around Disaster’s neck as she stood with him in a firm bridal carry.

Disaster marched the two of them into the bedroom and shifted Shirk to one arm as she pulled the sheets down with the other. Shirk could only stare at his girlfriend as she dropped him on the bed and moved around to crawl in herself. She leaned over him and pressed a kiss to the end of his nose.

“Night night, baby.” She curled up on her side happily and Shirk blinked up at the ceiling as he pulled the sheets up.

“...Uh, good night.”


	3. Two Person Carry

“Well, this has gone to Hell in a hand basket, hasn’t it?!” Ace yelled over the roar of the wind. They leaned out of the side of the helicopter with their rocket launcher aimed on one shoulder and giggled to themself as they looked down the sight.

“If only Aunt Jackie could see me now…” Disaster muttered as she fought with the helicopter controls, desperately keeping the thing in the air through, at that point, sheer force of will.

“Just get us down somewhere near a hospital!” Vinny yelled up to her as Shirk cussed and spat under their hands. He’d been the only one of the four of them unlucky enough to be shot, and his anti-luck was so strong, he’d caught the little piece of lead right in his gut.

“Working on it!” Disaster yelled and bitched under her breath at whatever higher power was listening as yet another alarm started blaring.

“I’m fucking fine!” Shirk hissed and Vinny shook their head, both unimpressed and not really listening.

“Sure you are, bitch. You’re just leaking goddamn cherry fucking Kool-Aid everywhere!” Vinny pressed the gauze they’d found into Shirk’s gut and he jolted and grumbled.

“I might have something!” Disaster called and started angling the chopper down towards the roof of a hospital. “Everyone grab onto something and cross your fingers we don’t die today!”

“Fingers are crossed!” Ace yelled back and hauled themself back inside, slinging into a seat and helping Vinny situate Shirk in the seat between the two of them.

The chopper skidded across the roof of the hospital, the screeching of the metal mixing with Shirk’s groaning, Ace’s whooping, and Disaster’s cursing. Vinny was the only silent one of the four of them, mostly because they were too busy white-knuckling the seat belt across their chest.

Finally, the helicopter wobbled to a stop and everyone brethed a collective sigh of relief. Disaster came out of the cockpit and pulled her gun back out, in order to threaten some poor doctor into performing surgery on Shirk.

“Get him up.” She told Ace and Vinny. “I’ll get us an operating room.” With that, she hopped out of the helicopter and headed inside, a determined look promising Hell for anyone who got in her way.

Vinny sighed and unbuckled themself and Shirk. Then they took one of Shirk’s arms and threw it over their neck while Ace did the same on Shirk’s other side.

“Oh, this is gonna suck.” Shirk muttered. And that was the last thing he said for awhile that wasn’t cuss words and groaning.

Ace and Vinny carried him to the first OR they saw, where Disaster held a doctor and several nurses at gunpoint. While the nurses looked panicked, the doctor rolled his eyes like this sort of thing happened a lot.

… Well, they were in Los Santos.

“Alright, let’s get started.” The doctor said once Shirk was laid out on the table.

-

Later, once Shirk was stable and asleep, Disaster sitting at his bedside and Vinny and Ace playing gin rummy on the windowsill, they were all finally able to relax. 

“That was too close.” Disaster muttered into the stillness of the room, and Ace leaned back against the wall.

“Well, as long as we stay as lucky as we were today, we’ll be just fine.”

“Plus, we could probably track Lady Luck down and just hold a gun on her.” Vnny joked, which made the other two chuckle. Disaster gathered herself and swept a stray strand of Shirk’s hair out of his face.

“Yeah… We’ll be fine.”


End file.
